Dear ... Everyone Who Wants Me To Do Things

Dear ... Everyone Who Wants Me To Do Things

Dear Everyone,

I am tired.

I am very tired.

And I am tired during almost every minute of the day in which I am not asleep.

I try to do my job without yawning and although mornings are often blurry, I don't let my children leave the house with syrup smeared across their faces. But still ... I nap at least three times a week and have contemplated whether or not it would be a misuse of sick time to go home and sleep during the work day.

Supposedly, going under general anesthesia results in several months of fatigue. I went under three times. Menopause causes hot flashes, night sweats and insomnia. Anxiety and depression are known to hinder a good night's sleep. And Tamixofen, the cancer drug that I will take for five years, has tiredness as a side effect. So, I guess this shouldn't be shocking to me.

But it's been eight and a half months! I am a zombie.

Also, I'm sad. And pretending all day that I'm not is exhausting.

To those of you who are wondering if I'm okay, I am. I'm healthy. I don't have cancer. I'm not undergoing any horrific treatments and don't have any surgeries scheduled. But in case you were unsure, it is not very helpful to say: "Are you all right? You don't look good." You can all just stop that. No one wants to hear that they look like crap.

Plus, the next time someone says that to me, I will either cry or smack them. I'm not saying which ... it's a surprise.